What’s another word for numb…. is it indifference?

Ok, I’m back.

Yesterday ended with my angry silence and a text from my mother telling me that I needed to go to their hotel this morning and say goodbye properly.  I did not respond. 

I haven’t spoken to them since I said, “see ya” last night.

This morning, I’m in emotional hangover mode.  Meh!

However, I am picking myself UP and am dusting myself OFF.  I emailed two professors that I know in order to find more work.  If I’m going to be successful at this college gig shit, I need to find a better paying job.  Currently, I make barely enough to buy a shard of rock.

So, one school didn’t pan out, nor did I expect them to.  Every so often, I like to ruffle the dust to see if anything’s open.  I made crazy money there… and frankly, I miss that and the fact that I had an OFFICE.


The other school is my other alma mater… I emailed my former advisor (who’ll die at his desk, apparently), and he sent me to the new department chair (they rotate… and I’ve been waiting for my former advisor to be supervisor again, but shit… that may take a lifetime at this rate).  I know this professor, although I didn’t have any classes with her.

SO… we’ll see.  I just need two classes… added the two I already have… well, that’d be better money than last semester AND the semester before it, for certain.

Currently, I’m killing time by writing new PowerPoints/notes for the fall for the class with a new textbook so in the event that I DO get a class or two at my alma mater (which I call, “The school that has done shit to help me since I graduated over 10 years ago”).

We’ll see rabbit… we’ll see.

I do feel BETTER then I did last night. 

What does make me sad is that #2 son’s birthday was yesterday and it was marred by my parents inability to be sensitive to the people around them…

THIS you’ll find sad, then the other you’ll find funnyishsorta.

I made marinated porkchops and orzo with wilted spinach (grown on my deck… YEY!!)… and a nice tossed salad of mixed greens with strawberries and cheddar.  For dessert I had a ricotta cheese pie that I had made.

MY parents BROUGHT sandwiches to eat.  They did not WANT the food that I was cooking… and, instead, ate take out AT MY TABLE.

I was FUMING MAD… at their arrogance, their blatant disrespect, and the rudeness they demonstrated.  How could anyone do that?

We had the five of us, them, and #1 son’s gf at the table.  The ENTIRE meal… of which I didn’t utter a peep or a sound (neither did my middle son, who would occasionally shoot me a look from across the table… and looked incredibly sad)… as they dominated the conversation with what amounted to a tourist guide to Arizona and how great they are. 

I don’t recall them peeing on the four corners of my house before coming in.  Who said it was their territory?  They are GUESTS at my table, in my house, and frankly, to be honest, they suck at being good guests and have overstayed their welcome YEARS ago.  Until they begin to act like guests and be more respectful to me and my family, I will not permit them to visit us again, nor will we spent a huge sum of money to visit them.

After they finally left, as I sat stoically on the chair playing a game on my DS, the gf said something that almost made me fall over…

“OH MY GOD, I’m SO sorry for you.”

Pity from the gf.  Great.

“That’s nothing… they get worse with a bigger crowd.”

For the next hour or so, I had to listen to my oldest son and his gf bash his grandparents. 

I’m trying to remain focused on acquiring more work for the fall.  The bad news is that the numbers (student population) are down (though, if you saw my classes, they started off OVER the maximum limit of 35 and after the lazies quit, it was STILL around 30 per class)…  in layman terms it means that I probably will not have extra classes for the fall.  So, I’m scrambling for more.

Scrambling’s not easy, fyi.

Anyway, I’m going to go back to making my powerpoints.  I wanted to let  you all know that I have survived… and a HUGE weight has lifted from my shoulders and I am happy to say, relief is in the air (literally) for the next 3-1/2 hours…

Then, we’ll see what happens.

Til then… ciao, adios, and don’t let a bat hit you in the caboose.

4 thoughts on “What’s another word for numb…. is it indifference?

  1. To quote from Glenn Campell, paraphrased slightly: “Thank God and Greyhound they’re gone!” We have a saying at work, “You can’t fix stupid.” I think that should be amended to say, “You can’t fix stupid and arrogant.”

    Your parents, by refusing to eat what you fixed, may actually have gone beyond the extremes of mine. And that, my dear, is a record of outrageous proportions.

    Good riddance and good for you for holding yourself together after a pair of walking nightmares like those.

  2. No, you can’t fix stupid and arrogant, ’cause if they weren’t so stupid, they’d know about arrogant. Y’know, my mother was a pain in the a$$, but she *never* would have acted like that. At least she tried not to be difficult.

    Which didn’t quite work; the kids asked me, “how come Gramma doesn’t like you?”

    If there is a next time, when you cook a fancy pork dish and your parents bring take out instead, the comment should be: “So sorry, dear, I didn’t realize you were kosher.”

  3. I’m glad they are gone….and so sorry they continue to act like such rude people. It’s hard to believe that whatever groups of “friends” they have can’t see how they are. I bet they are the very popular with other people who don’t see their behavior towards you and your experiences…..
    Anyway, good for you for holding it back….and sorry you had to go through a replay with #1 son and hif gf on “their” take of the situation.
    Good luck with finding more work or even selling your house. There has to be a reason you go through this all the time……I am sure you have learned whatever lessons you were meant to learn this time on earth…..
    It’s time for a new day….

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