Ripping the wings off flies

I’m EXHAUSTED.  Today was #3 son’s bowling birthday party with his friends.  (Ever gone bowling with a bunch of hyper 5 year olds and live to tell about it?  Yeah, me either…)

First, I’ll back up to yesterday.

My son had this fantastic idea… to make a “monster truck” cake inclusive of a mud track (chocolate frosting) and a truck jumping a hill.

SUPER idea, if I must say so myself.  At least… UNTIL I tried to replicate a picture we saw on the Internet.  (*sighs*)  Ok, for the most part, I consider myself quite handy, crafty, and creative.  However… for the life of me, I could not figure out how to safely construct a monster truck track without going overboard (as I tend to do most of the time).  Well, (as I stall while attempting to use my ISP’s UPDATED email version because my OUTLOOK flickered and died, to get the pictures off of my blackberry… I’m stalling, if you couldn’t tell… because for WHATEVER reason, the pictures aren’t sending as a picture, but rather as a weird file that I don’t know what to do with… so, hum a song and I’ll be right back)… um (it isn’t WORKING… *curses the ISP because it decided to be all technologically advanced and shit)… ANYWHO…

WHEN the pictures allow themselves to be teleported to my email and then transferred and uploaded to my diary/blog, I will post them (because the one pic came out cute)… and please, for the love of all that’s snarky and snitty, don’t tell me it looks like a big mound of poo-colored something with a truck jammed in the middle.  It may hurt my feelings a little…

Thankfully, I used REDUCED sugar frosting… because I tend to lick my fingers when they fall into something chocolately…

(Don’t worry, I washed my hands EACH and EVERY time…)

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National Uprising Update:

Gas prices have reached $3.79/gal of regular gas and the price has not MOVED in 2 days.  (*Waits for the Hallelujah Chorus to begin*)  Though… I DO need gas (I’m down to a quarter tank) and by the time I get OUT to get gas (because I need to hit the store), it’ll be up to $3.87/gal because that’s how we roll in Jersey… hit’em where it hurts (which usually means “in the wallet”).

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I have a freakish tendency to buy gossip mags and this time, I purchased the one with the celebrities-in-bathing-suits-with-bumps-jiggles-and-sags.  OH LORD… my eyes, my EYES!  (Actually, I do not support pressuring people to starve themselves so that they look gor-skeleton-geous.  I like “regular-sized” people; however, when celebrities let themselves go it is NOT pretty.

Granted, you’ll never see MY fat ass in a bikini, bending over and showing the world MY goodies.  I’m too classy for that.

(Though, there ARE pictures out there of me dressed in a clown outfit, throwing confetti at kids…)

(I refuse to discuss that.)

(And, I’m too lazy to backspace.)

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Cat Update:  Last night, while attempting to get into MY bed in the dark, the cat got spooked and clawed his way off the bed… by clawing his way OVER my husband’s head, leaving a nasty scratch across the top of his nearly-naked head.

I felt HORRIBLE, however, the cat went about his evening… until I cut it short and threw him out of the bedroom so that I could tend to my husband’s wound.

I told him that he could scratch ME on the head, therefore our stories would be in sync… we had a cat fight.

Get it? Cat fight?

He didn’t laugh at it last night, but I’m sure it made him smile this morning.

Or not.

 

Anyway, I need to roll… someone has to cook dinner and I guess it’s going to be ME.  Again.  (sighs)

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One Last Update:  My oldest son wants to go to a girl’s house to watch a rented movie.  I told him he can go IF I get to talk to her mother to make sure that either she or dad will be there (preferrably DAD).  He growled at me and went upstairs to text her.  “You mean, CALL her?”  Yes, dummy… as in speak aloud. 

By the way, YES I AM A PARTY POOPER.  I also do not want to be a grandmother anytime soon.  So, if you want to leave a comment in order to tell me that I’m being overprotective, then don’t.  I get enough condescending shit from my FATHER.  Besides, I think that it’s only respectable for one mom to give a shout out to the other… especially if our kids may end up dating at some point.  Right? Right.  And, I don’t feel comfortable letting a 16 year old girl be alone AFTER 8pm (he wants to go over AFTER work) in a bedroom or whatever.  Our rules–must be in an open space, not confined in a bedroom, and all doors must always be OPEN, regardless of who the hell you THINK you are. (In this case, a 17 year old who’s never had a girlfriend before.)