What have I learned during these past three semesters teaching college that not all college students are created equally.
The majority are lazy, driveless, whiners who spent more time complaining about their grades than doing something ABOUT their grades. And, when given an assignment 2 weeks in advance, spend 2 weeks whining about it, then spending an hour writing it… usually an hour before its due. This then leaves me with this feeling of dread soon to be followed by disappointment, frustration, and ensuing bitterness.
And, throughout this semester… while fielding whining complainers, I’ve been thinking about a career change (still). This is what I’ve decided…
I’m going to open a bar. And, I will call it, “The Gae Pirate Bar”… we’ll have theme nights, and the entire staff will dress like pirates and speak in piratesque.
Therefore, I will have NO papers to grade, no whining grade whores, no lazy bastards to try to motivate… but I would rather deal with deck swabbing and keelhalling…
Much more fun, to be certain.
I would say, “Arggggggggggggh!” and wear an eye patch, and hobble around.
Oh, and it wouldn’t be a GAY (homosexual) bar… although, I think the gay community would definitely make my days more fun. (And, I can pick up some decorating tips to boot!)
…..
So, how is my semester going? I’m stressed out. I eat Pepcids like candy. I have a headache about 50% of the time, usually brought on by the whining bitches who take my classes.
I’ve officially given my notice at the tutoring office. Their lack of efficiency, professionalism, and organization is blinding… and frustrating. Double booking students, changing procedures without telling the night staff… not to mention, having to play referee between the two supervisors has just about pushed me over the edge. So, I told one supervisor (who is around my age) that I was giving my two weeks’ notice. She nearly cried. I stood my ground, telling her that I’m very tired and need more time to grade my students’ papers and tests (God knows that its taking forever to do so as their grammar and spelling are so poor that I can’t even focus on the content)… but most of all, I’d rather spend that time OUT of school and with my family.
Now, granted, I only tutor 4 hrs a week, but… during those 4 hrs, I’m play receptionist, scheduler, babysitter, referee, advice giver.. and that’s not even including being a tutor.
Not long ago, I had an “issue” with a tutor in the office (who was also a teacher at the school) who was bad-mouthing me to those students she tutored who were my students. I was (furious) angry… and demanded that this faceless creature introduce herself and apologize to me. If someone calls me difficult and a waste of academic time because I’m too hard and a bitch to a student who LIKES me… and that student TELLS me… I get angry. I’ve worked hard to maintain my reputation as a tough teacher who cares to have this snitty little bitch mar my reputation with her bitching.
Not to mention, I have NO IDEA who she is…
And, apparently, after telling the tutoring supervisors that I wanted an apology, I get a phone call from the DEAN… asking me what had happened.
After a month, I doubt I’ll be getting an apology any time soon. However, my plan on flying UNDER the radar for as long as I’m at this school were shot to hell when the tutoring supervisors decided to “share” my complaint w/ the higher ups. (Damn them.)
What can you do…
*sighs*
I may be flying with my youngest to Arizona to see my parents during my spring break (which, unfortunately, is different from his spring break, but I don’t want to fly alone … because its boring… and as he’s the youngest, he has had the least amount of contact with his grandparents than the older boys)… that is, IF I can get the money together…
This has also been a difficult semester as at least 3 people I knew have died. Earlier in the semester, we lost a close family member. A month ago, my friend lost her mother after a short bout with brain cancer. And, another person I knew passed away.
I’ve bitched (endlessly) about the inappropriate use of the word “pandemic” (which reminds me of the time when I bitched about oral sex not being considered “sex” by a former president, which then demonstrated to young kids that having oral sex is not sex, and therefore OKAY to do… leaving us reeling when the head coach and I (her assistant) of a 5th and 6th grade girls softball team told us that girls in their grades were having “blow job” parties because it wasn’t sex.
Um.
Wow.
Right?
I have also gained 10 lbs of pure stress and aggravation. If I gain ANY MORE WEIGHT I WILL LOSE MY MIND… and need an entirely NEW warddrobe…which I can’t afford…
I also cannot read, listen to, or discuss any more child murders. There IS no jusification for selling your child as a sex slave, or killing him/her because he/she gets on your nerves. Some people, as I have verbalized lately in class, should NEVER be permitted to procreate. We should seek out those fools and sterilize them immediately. This way, hopefully, we may be able to create less of a need by unstable, ill-equipped, and crazy parents from having kids, then screwing with them emotionally, physically, or sexually.
And, I also seem to think (and am now seen as crazy because of it) that the family of the child victim of a violent crime should get… hmm… 10-15 minutes of alone time with the perpertrator. Therefore, familial justice (or social justice) can occur… which, essentially would take care of court costs, lawyer fees, and years of appeals and delays. Justice would be served… duly, and appropriately… falling within the Constitution’s “fair-and-speedy-trial” specification.
Let me be the person in charge of justice, please? Crazy drivers… tailgaters… wife beaters… child neglecters… rapists… Give me the ENTIRE lot of them… and I will dole out the necessary justice… either deeming what it shall be or assigning it to a person who is qualified to perform the punishment.
Then, perhaps, I can alleviate some of this frustration I’ve been harboring inside of me… and I can save my Pepcids for when I am having chili or tomato sauce… and can sleep without having dreams about instructing students on the most effective way to squirt hand sanitizer or writing notes on the board. I can check my email without being afraid of what may be in there… and go to work without worrying about whether or not I will be fired next.
Did I mention that a few staff members were fired in one week recently? That’s enough to unnerve me… especially when the individual who runs our school has made it plain and clear that if a student complains about any of us, that our job will be immediately terminated.
(Not without due process, you fat bastard… you want to fire me, you best be prepared to prove it was warranted!!)
Anyway, I need to take a Pepcid (too much food) and goto bed…
I hope you had a happy Thanksgiving…
Oh, before I forget… I am thankful for my family… for my job (even if there is no security)… my friends… and most especially my readers who I have unduly neglected and promise to not be so distance from again).
Night all!

